For children from the hard places Christmas can be a challenging time with many emotions.
For the children who have lived with others before their forever family, nearing the Christmas Season can bring excitement and hope along with memories of disappointments, broken promises and sometimes hunger. The brain developed around these negative experiences, so as Christmas Eve/Day approaches parents may experience their child(ren) having more melt downs. A child spending his or her first Christmas in your home has no ideas what to expect. As the child builds on the family Christmas traditions melt downs decrease.
Christmas comes but once a year, and so the healing process continues as the child heals more and more each year.
When our children have melt downs Christmas Eve/Day we take a “time in” and then do a “redo” and go on with life. The following Christmas may not be so bad, maybe one small melt down rather then several.
Prior to Christmas we talk about how we celebrate Christmas and at times have puppet shows to illustrate.
I try to keep prep for Christmas low key and not high stress…this should be a fun time for the family!
I don’t push all baking into the Advent Season; during the Christmas Season we have the Solemnities of the Holy Family, Mother of God/New Years and Epiphany. All of which require some holiday baked goods, so I plan out what is going to be baked for each Christmas celebration.
Christmas can be hard for children who have spent every Christmas with his or her forever family. The child’s prenatal and birth experienceces can come with them and for reasons they don’t understand Christmas can be both joyous and painful. Adoptive families can be surprised by melt downs…again “time in” and “redo’s” work well as well as the continued message that they are loved and valued.
Will work on posting video on Time In and Redo’s in the near future!
Happy Advent!!!